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This is one of our top toilet training tips. So why should you avoid directly asking your child “do you need to go to the toilet?”
Asking a direct question increases the likelihood of your child saying no. Toddlers are exploring boundaries and limits, their favourite word is no.
In all other situations where you ask your child a “do you want?” question, you honour their response “no”. For example “do you want yoghurt?”, “do you want to go outside?”. “Do you want to give X a hug?”. This is no different when it comes to toilet training. If your child says “no” and we transition them anyways, we are going to meet resistance. This resistance can take the form of shouting no, crying or hitting. Everyone ends up feeling more stressed around using the toilet.
Next time your child shows signs that they need to wee (holding themselves, wiggling, finding a quiet spot), try these steps:
Give them the choice “do you want to skip to the toilet or hop to the toilet?”, “do you want to use the toilet upstairs or downstairs?”. Giving this paired choice removes answering “no” as an option.
Be direct and remove the choice “I see you need to wee, let’s go to the toilet”.
In both these examples, choose your moment, pick a time when your child is not engaged with a highly preferred activity this will make the transition to the toilet easier.
If you need support with toilet training, check our Instagram page for tips or contact us through our website here.